Pretend it didn’t happen! Kate Plus 8‘s Tuesday, January 26, season finale features Kate Gosselin reflecting on tense scenes from previous episodes, as seen in Us Weekly‘s exclusive sneak peek.

In the clip, the 40-year-old mom of eight cringes while watching herself bicker with best friend Jamie during their ill-fated cross-country RV trip that aired on the TLC series in 2011.

“This was us at our worst ever,” Gosselin says in the new episode. “It was just too much stress. The constant breakdowns, the constant whatever — I mean, that would have torn anyone apart.”

Gosselin admits that she does have some positive memories from the difficult vacation, but there are also moments from it that she prefers not to think about.

“Jamie and I are still best friends, and we had to talk through that whole [trip] like, ‘What the heck happened?'” the TV star continues. “And honestly, I think the stress level was just so much that kids were at their worst, parents were at their worst. That’s why it’s just sad.”

Watch the video above.

Kate Plus 8‘s season finale airs on TLC on Tuesday, January 26, at 10 p.m. EST.

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